Just Dance
by E. M. Morning
Summary: Edgar and Alan Frog do not go to school dances; it's just not their thing. Well, that is until someone asks them and Sam forces them to accept.
1. Chapter One

Just Dance

It is safe to say that the Frog brothers do not lead lives of the average American teenager or teenagers from any other country to be precise. They do not do normal things like participating in school sports, as players or spectators, they do not party with friends on weekends, getting into juvenile trouble, they don't go to the mall and they certainly do not go to dances. There is no time for such foolish, childish activities. They have a city to protect as well as a comic book store to run along with bills to pay. No, there is no time for any of those regular high school activities; especially not dances. Just the thought of it causes them to shiver in disgust. Being crowded in a hot, sweaty room with a bunch of annoying kids and tacky decorations sounds just like an absolutely terrible idea to them, it could even be considered torture.

So no, Edgar and Alan do not do school dances. They have never asked anyone to a dance before and no one has asked them either. They are perfectly fine with it. They have no time to socialize with civilians, especially under such spine shivering circumstances. They had never given the idea of attending a dance a single though.

Well, that is until today.

Both brothers were at their lockers quickly piling books necessary for homework into their backpacks. They need to get out of school as soon as possible; their parents decided they would go to work for once, so the boys are anxious to get to the store to make sure it has not been turned to ruins. While they continue to rush, Sam walks towards them with a slight spring in his step. He is buzzing with excitement, practically bouncing off the walls with joy because one of the greatest things had just happened to him, and he needs to inform his closest friends.

"Hey guys!" he says grinning.

Edgar glances as him as he slings on his book bag. "What's wrong with you?"

"What's wrong with me? Nothing! I'm great, just spectacular!"

"Then why are you acting strange?" Alan asks, adjusting his hat.

"Stranger than normal," his brother adds.

Sam decides to ignore Edgar's usual rude remark; he is in too good of a mood to let anything get him down. "Get this," he says. "Cristey, this girl in my English class, just asked me to go to that Sadie Hawkins dance."

Edgar and Alan exchange looks. This frustrates Sam; it does every time the brothers do it. He can never tell if they are talking about him or making fun of him or whatever the hell they are doing. "You know, the dance where the girls ask the guys out? The one that is next week?"

They blink.

"Do you even know what I am talking about?"

"Of course we do," Edgar says.

"And that is all you're going to say? Or not say, I guess."

Alan feels a little bad for Sam. He does not want to squish his only friend's, aside from Edgar, enthusiasm, even if it is over something stupid. "Good work," he offers.

"Uh, thanks," Sam says making it sound more like a question. The three began to head towards the main doors. "So, are you guys going?"

"Nope," Edgar replies.

"Why? Are you working again? You know, you guys work way too much."

"No," Alan says. "We're not working."

"Then why aren't you going?"

"We don't do dances," Edgar says in his manly, serious vampire hunter tone. "They are a complete waste of time."

"And fun," Sam adds.

"If you want to call that fun."

"Then what are you doing that is so much more fun?"

"The usual," Edgar says. "Someone has to watch this city while the rest of you dance around like idiots."

Sam shakes his head. Sometimes he cannot understand those two. He needs to give them a few lessons in being normal and cool like him. Two girls walk pass them, slowing down to watch the three boys remove their bikes from the bike rack. "I'm not sure about this anymore," one of the girls says. She is the shorter of the two with dark brown hair chopped in a chunky fashion.

Her friend shakes her head. "Just go and get it over with. What is the worst that can happen?"

"He could say no." The girl's dark eyes widen as she says it. Rejection: one of the greatest fears of a teenage girl. How horrible it would be to conjure up enough courage to even go up to a guy and mange to get that question out in that awkwardly squeaky teenage just to be turned down! And in front of people too! Oh, she will just die if that happens! She will scream as she melts in embarrassment, leaving behind only a puddle of teenage girl on the concrete.

"I think that would be the least of your problems," the other says rolling her eyes. "Let's go!" She grabs the brunette by the wrist and drags her over to where Sam and the Frog brothers were standing.

"Excuse me," she says. "My friend here needs to talk to you." The brunette's eyes widen again, mortified by her campaigning's boldness. She is going to be a puddle before she can even get to be rejected.

The three boys look at each other. What the hell is this girl talking about?

The taller girl sighs, shaking her head again so that her blond hair hits against her cheeks. "You," she says pointing to Alan. "My friend, this cute girl here, her name is Eileen and she needs to talk to you." She pushes her friend forward. Eileen stumbles and shoots her friend a glare.

"Gina," she hisses through her teeth. "What are you doing?"

"Just go," Gina whispers for her. "I don't have all day."

Eileen slowly turns to face the three boys. When her eyes stop on Alan, the butterflies start to kick in; angry, vicious butterflies that kick at her stomach until she feels as if she is about to throw up. Oh, please God don't let her throw up! Not in front of people! Please no on people either! Well, maybe Gina. If she must throw up she better do it on that pushy friend of hers. "I. Um," she begins.

Alan blinks, waiting for her to say something.

"I-I."

He is growing impatient. He has a store to check in on before there is no store left. What does this girl have to say that could possibly take so long?

"I-I-I was w-w-wond-d-ering."

That was the only thing he could make out. The rest of her sentence came out in one mass of jumbled up words. "What?"

Eileen bites her lower lip. She already asked him once and now she has to do it again! Could this day get any worse? Well, yeah; he still has to reject her. Maybe she should just stop now while she still has dignity left. Gina jabs her in the back, urging her to speak. Never mind, apparently her friend wants her to die of embarrassment. Just do what Gina told you, Eileen says to herself. Just look him in the eyes and ask. That's all there is too it.

Eileen takes in a breath and looks Alan in right in the eyes. Oh God, he's looking and her and does not look happy! It is all ready over; screwed up for sure! Gina was wrong, it's not that easy; not for her! Fucking Gina! "I was wondering," she says in nearly a whisper. "If you wanted to go to the dance with me next week."

Alan blinks, feeling confused. Did she really just ask that? He glances over at his brother to help. Edgar, in a very un-Edgar like state, is on the verge of bursting out into laughter. He smiles at Alan a shit-eating grin, and Alan has the urge to punch it right off of his face. He knows that for the next couple of days all he will be hearing is Edgar's taunting cackling. Alan scowls at his brother before turning back to the girl. He will tell her no; he does not go to dances and he will not put up with his brother's teasing. Before he gets a chance to turn her down, Sam steps in.

"Excuse us for a second," he says, pulling Alan aside.

Eileen nods and turns to her friend. "See, I told you," she says, her voice cold and sharp like a sliver of ice. "I told you he was going to say no! This is entirely your fault!"

"You were the one that wanted to ask him," Gina replies. "I don't even see why you are asking him."

"I like him" Eileen says, taking a quick glance back at Alan. "I think he's cute."

Gina shrugs. "Fine. But, hey, at least you got it over with! You can always find another guy if he turns you down."

"I suppose."

"You can't tell her no," Sam says to Alan.

"Yeah I can."

"No, you can't. Did you see how scared she was? It will crush her if you say no."

Alan stares at Sam, unsure of what point he is trying to make.

"That would make you a jerk," Sam explains. "And that is not good. I know you guys are supposed to be these badass monster killers, but you can't be that heartless."

"Yeah, Alan," Edgar says. "Have a heart."

Alan glares at his brother. "No. I'm not doing this, Sam."

"Oh yes you are. You are going to tell that girl yes, and then you are going to go with her to the dance and have fun like a normal person. Alrighty, Mister?"

Alan scowls. This has got to be the worst day of his life. Those two are going to get it later.

"Hey, he said he would," Sam says to the girls.

Eileen turns around. "Really?"

Alan looks to Sam, who nods. Yes, he is going. "Yeah, sure I guess," he mumbles.

Eileen grins, her eyes lighting up in pure joy. She would squeal and do those stupid girly jumps if they were still not watching her. She will have to save it for later when it is just her and Gina. Oh, and when she tells her mom! Her mother will be so excited to hear about this! She has a date; a real date that actually said yes! This is the best day of her life! Eileen looks back at her friend. Gina flashes her a thumbs up. "Good job, kid," she says.

"So, what do you want to do? Do you want me to pick you up or do you want to meet there?"

"Uh, I don't know."

"Oh. Well, we can talk about it later. We have all week to decide!"

Alan looks over at Edgar. He's still grinning, that stupid brother of his. Forget this being the worst day; this is going to be the worst week of his life.

"Are you going with anyone?" Eileen asks Edgar. She is excited now, back to her normal self where she is not afraid to speak.

Edgar scowls at her. How can this girl even ask him that? Does she not know anything? Of course he is not! "No."

"Oh, you could go with Gina!"

"Eh, you're getting a little ahead of yourself," Gina says.

"I think it sounds like a great idea!" Sam says. Edgar shoots his friend a glare, and Alan cannot help smiling. Now Edgar will have nothing to laugh at. He will have to suffer too.

"Yeah!" Eileen exclaims. "You like vampires, right? Gina was just reading a book about them."

"I don't like vampires," Edgar says, returning to his ultra manly voice. Seriously, what is wrong with this girl? "I hate them. We'll see how much you like them they are ripping out your throat and-."

"Alright," Sam cuts in. Good lord, Edgar has no common sense! "That's enough, Edgar. So what do you say?"

"I say-."

"I'm fine with it," Gina says, smirking at Edgar. "It could be fun."

"Yes, fun!" Eileen exclaims.

"Looks like you're going, bro," Alan whispers to Edgar.

"I am going to hit you if you-."

"Good!" Sam says. "It's settled then. We'll catch up with you girls later."

"Yeah. Bye, Alan!" Eileen says, still beaming before Gina pulls her away.

The boys wait until they are out of sight until they start talking again. "I hate you," Edgar says. "I hate you both. And I am not going."

"You kind of have to," Sam says. "They're expecting you."

"That's not my problem."

"You're going," Sam says. "Come on, it won't be that bad. Who knows, maybe you guys will have fun!"

The Frog brothers look at each other sharing expressions of misery. No, it was not going to be fun. There is a reason they do not go to dances. Sam will have to pay for this, he will pay greatly.

* * *

**So I have one of those Sadie Hawkins dances this week- and just let me say that asking someone out is one of the most terrifying positions one can find one's self in- and it just got me thinking about if the Frog brothers ever went to school dances. They probably didn't, but I shall make them! This will probably be on chapter longer, possibly two but most likely one. It's a bit random and nothing like I have written before, so please bear with me! It is most defiantly not my best work, but bleh. **


	2. Chapter Two

Just Dance

Chapter Two

"I'm not going," Edgar says as he pushes open the front door to the comic store.

"Yes you are," Sam replies. "I will make you go if I have to."

"You couldn't make me do anything."

Sam considers this. Yes, Edgar is probably right. "But that girl asked you to go, so you have to."

"No she didn't; you and that other girl did. Plus, I am not going to some stupid dance with a girl that is delusional enough to think vampires are actually cool." Edgar shudders at the thought. Some days he believes that the human race cannot get any more foolish than it already is, but then some other ignorant person comes along and proves him wrong. It is such a disheartening and frustrating feeling.

"You're going too," Sam says to Alan. Alan shakes his head as he grabs a comic book and slides onto the counter. "Come on guys! It's not going to be that bad. It's not like it's going to kill you or anything."

"You don't know that," Edgar says. "What if all the vampires in Santa Carla take advantage of our absence and join together in some super fucked up vampire army to attack the people of Santa Carla while we are trapped a fucking school dance?"

Sam blinks. "I doubt that is going to happen. I think Santa Carla can handle one night without you guys. And by the way, you probably should not do the vampire talk. I am not sure if you have noticed, but it kind of weirds people out."

"They should be grateful that we are even protecting their ignorant asses."

Sam shakes his head. "We have a lot of work to do before next week."

"Work?" Alan asks, looking up from the comic.

"Yes! I mean, no offence, guys, but you can't go out looking and acting like Rambo."

Edgar snorts. "So now we are supposed to take fashion advice from you?"

"Well, you are going to have to dress up a little."

"No."

"There are the only clothes we have," Alan adds as he turns a page.

"Then we are going to have to go shopping."

"No!" Edgar exclaims, poking a finger at Sam's face. "No shopping, no dressing up and no dance!"

"Uh- are you guys alright?"

The three boys turn to see who had spoken. They see Michael and Star walking through the store looking a little alarmed but over all amused. "I'm trying to make him go to the dance next week," Sam explains.

"So you asked Edgar to a dance?" Michael says as he walks into the store, stopping next to the counter. Star takes the place next to him, trying to resist the urge to smile.

"No! I'm going with this Cristey girl. Some girl asked Alan so we're making Edgar go with one of her friends."

"Way to go, bud," Michael says poking Alan in the arm. Alan slowly turns his head to him and scowls.

"I'm not going," Edgar announces again.

"Yes you are," Sam says. "You are going to go and I will help you so you don't look like such an idiot around girls."

"Because you know so much about girls, Sammy," Michael says, grinning at his little brother.

"Well, yeah! Probably as much as you do!"

Star places a hand over her mouth to help muffle her growing fit of giggles. Michael raises an eyebrow. "You better not."

"You teach them then," Sam says. "Since you know about girls so much."

Michael looks at the two Frog brothers staring with their solemn expressions, waiting for him to reply. Are they even teachable, he wonders. "Uh, I don't know. You seemed like you wanted to, Sammy; I think you can handle it."

"Yeah Michael," Star says with a hint of laughter in her voice. "Let's see you teach."

"I don't even know what you want me to say."

"You could start with dancing etiquette," Star offers, "since it is a dance and all."

"I am not dancing," Alan says.

"But it's fun!"

"No."

"Yes," Sam says, grinning as a new plot hatches in his mind. He walks over to Alan and grabs onto his friends wrists, trying to pull him off of the counter. "Dance with Alan, Mike."

"I'm not dancing," Alan says again as he struggles against Sam. God, that scrawny little fashion victim is stronger than he looks.

Edgar quickly joins the struggle and also grabs onto Alan helping aid Sam in the attempt to humiliate his brother. "Quit being such a baby."

"What the hell are you doing?" Alan growls. He is no match for the both of them; Edgar and Sam succeed with getting him off of the counter. "You are supposed to be on my side."

"Not when it is your fault that we're in this mess."

The two push Alan up to Michael. "Alright, Mike; teach him how to dance!" Sam says, satisfied that his plans are going well for once.

Michael looks at Alan unsure of what to do. "Is he going to bite me or something?"

"Nah! Don't let that angry face fool you; he's practically harmless!"

"Oh, we need music!" Star exclaims. "Do you guys have a radio?" Edgar points to the radio sitting next to the television. Star hurries over and turns it on. She flips through the stations, finally deciding on one that is playing a power ballad. Michael grins at Alan as he takes one of his hands and wraps an arm around the boy's waist. Alan feels his face starting to go red at the awkwardness of the situation. He is never going to survive this week.

"Hey now!" Sam says, pushing Alan and Michael further apart. "You can't be that close on your first date. You don't want to be so easy, Alan." Alan clenches his jaw, feeling more than ready to attack his friend. Edgar laughs at his brother's despair and only continues to do so more when Alan shoots him a glare.

Star giggles as she watches her boyfriend glide the young teen across the floor in an almost exaggerated manner. Alan stumbles a bit and tries his best to keep his focus on something else. This is quite possibly the worst day of his life. "Michael, you are being a terrible date," Star says. "You haven't even complimented him yet."

"Yeah, Mike," Sam says. "Where are your manners?"

"I'm sorry," Michael says. He looks down and laughs at Alan's obvious discomfort, finding it amusing to see the boy looking something rather than solemn."Um- you have nice eyes."

"You can do better than that!"

"Make sure you guys compliment the girl's dress," Star says. "Even if you don't like it."

"Can we stop now?" Alan mumbles.

"Nope!" Sam says. He turns the dial, trying to find a new channel now that the song has ended and commercials play instead. "You are going to need a lot more than one lesson." He looks over at Edgar, who is still grinning like a mad man. That's not fair, Sam says to himself; Edgar needs to suffer with his brother. "Don't think you are off the hook, Eddie! Star, would you like to be his partner?"

"Sure!"

Edgar's smile quickly vanishes as Star steps up to him and takes his hand. "Here," she says, grabbing the other arm and putting it around her waist. Edgar begins to blush as Star smiles at him.

"Aren't you two such a cute couple," Sam teases him. "Say something nice to her."

"Sam-."

"Come on, Edgar; the lady is waiting!"

Edgar mumbles out a sentence.

"What was that? You're going to have to speak a little more clearly, bud."

"I, um. I- I like your hair," he manages to stammer out. Sam laughs, clearly enjoying tormenting his friends. Even if he cannot force them to go to the actual event, having the opportunity to torture them like this was just as good.

Star giggles. "Why thank you! You are such a little gentleman. Michael, I think you have some competition now."

Michael glances over at the two and smirks. "I don't know," he says. "I may have to ditch you for Alan after this."

"Alright, we can stop now," Alan says, pulling away. This is getting a little too much awkward for him to handle.

"You can't quit yet!" Sam exclaims. "You guys need to be ready for Eileen and whatever her name is. Edgar, what's that girl's name again?"

"How am I supposed to know?"

"You don't even know your date's name?" Star asks.

"You are probably going to want to find that out," Michael adds.

Edgar scowls. "She is not my date and I am not going to any stupid dance."

"That's too bad," Star says in a tone mocking disappointment. "You're a pretty good dancer."

Edgar blushes again. "We can stop now."

"Fine," Sam says. He walks over and turns off the radio. "We will continue our lessons after a break."

"Thanks, bud," Michael says, patting Alan on the back. Alan turns to Sam and shoots him a glare; he will kill Sam Emerson is this continues.

"I'm still not going to that dance," Edgar says. "Especially after this. Now leave; we are trying to run a business here."

"What if I want to buy something?" Sam asks.

"You never buy anything. All you do is get your grubby finger prints all over our merchandise and annoy us with your immature shenanigans."

Sam laughs to himself; shenanigans. "But we have so much left to go over! We still have to work on small talk that does not involve vampires and clothes and finding out your date's name-."

"No," Edgar says as he begins to push Sam out of the store. "No lessons. No shopping. No stupid girls and no dances. How many times do I have to tell you that?"

"But, Edgar," Sam begins to say, his smile still plastered to his face. "You have got to know these things!"

"No I don't. "Edgar finally gets his friend out of the store. Star and Michael follow, both grinning at the situation. "Now leave!"

"Fine," Sam says pretending to be upset. "I will leave and let you cool off, but I will be back and you will dance."

"No," Edgar says, sharply turning away and walking back into the store.

Alan watches as the three walk out of sight. "Maybe we should lock the door."

Edgar glances at his brother. "You know this whole thing is entirely your fault."

"My fault?"

"Yeah, if you didn't tell that girl yes then I-."

"If I remember correctly you were right up there with Sam trying to make me go," Alan says, walking over to his brother. "I was going to say no, but you just had to intervene. If you didn't we would not have to listen to Sam."

"It's still your fault."

The brothers glare at each other, and for a moment they feel ready to attack each other. "Maybe we should blame Sam," Alan offers. "He's the one that is excited about that dance."

Edgar considers this. Blame Sam? Yes, that is a good idea. "We should beat him up."

"That wouldn't be very fair. Plus, he's our friend."

"Have you already forgotten what he just made us do?" Edgar asks. "He made you dance with Michael; friends do not do that to each other."

Alan knows that his brother is right. Damn Sam and his stupid lessons. "I guess we can get him back later."

"Let's do it before the dance so he hates us enough to not care if we go or not."

"That will probably make him try harder."

Edgar sighs. "I'm still not going."

"Me neither."

"So what should we do?"

"Hide?" Alan suggests.

Edgar shakes his head. No; bad-ass vampire hunters do not hide from anything, not even crappy, childish high school dances. "We'll figure a way out," he says. "I mean, we are against Sammy; how hard can it be to beat him?"

Alan nods. "Can we still lock the door, or at least guard it? Just in case they come back?"

"Sure."

* * *

**Well now, wasn't that fun? It is a little short for a chapter, at least shorter than I usually prefer, but oh well! This may actually turn out a bit longer than I had previously expected; only by a chapter or two, though. Let's just hope that Sam will be able to get them to the dance without getting killed! Or that the Frog brothers survive this processes without going crazy. Yay for dances! **


	3. Chapter Three

Just Dance

Chapter Three

A new idea is starting to take form in Sam Emerson's mind, and after yesterday's incident at the comic shop, he could not let it die. It is not very often that he has any sort of power over the Frog brothers or has the chance to torture them. But he had that golden opportunity now, and plans to do anything he can to prolong the experience, even if it may possibly mean death.

"Mike, I need a ride."

"No."

"But it's important!"

"I'm busy."

"No you're not. You're just lifting weights." Sam sighs once Michael shakes his head. He gets one chance to be an evil genius and it is going to be ruined by his brother's obsession with having to prove he can lift heavy things. He is such a tool. "Come on, Mike! It's really super important. I'm serious!"

"You're serious?" Michael asks as he tries to resist smiling at his little brother's enthusiasm.

"Yeah!"

"What do you need?"

"I want to take Edgar and Alan to the mall for another one of their lessons."

Michael looks over at him. "That is a terrible idea."

"If by terrible you me mean genius." Sam walks over to the bench and climbs on the bench, standing above his brother, pressing down on the weight in Michael's hands. "Then yes it is." Michael shakes his head and easily lifts Sam up off the bench.

"No I think it is just a terrible idea."

"Please, Mike." Good lord, he has now resorted to begging. He must make this happen. "It will be fun. Wasn't yesterday fun when we tortured them? Just imagine what it would be like once we get them out of their element."

It was fun. Who would have thought that the Frog brothers could be made so easily upset? Michael sighs. "Fine, but if we have to run when they try to kill us, I will trip you."

Sam grins. "Great! I'll go call them now!"

He called the comic book shop and gave the Frog brothers a fake story about a woman his grandpa had brought home; she was acting, potentially half vampireish and he was in desperate need for their investigating skills before his family is over taken by vampires again. The Frog brothers agreed just as Sam knew they would; there was no way that Edgar and Alan would ever turn down a chance for vampire hunting. They would leave the comic book store to their parents for the day; killing bloodsuckers comes before comics. "Thanks! We'll pick you up in ten," Sam says before hanging up. He turns towards his brother. "This is going to be fun."

Michael shakes his head. "There is something wrong with you, Sammy."

Edgar and Alan are waiting outside the store for Sam, fully prepared to do some vampire spying. Sam manages to keep his laughter at bay as his two unsuspecting friends getting into the car becoming trapped. It is not long until the two Frog brothers realize that something is not quite right with this situation. "This isn't the way to your house," Edgar says.

"Uh- We're not going there yet," Sam replies. "We have to make a quick pit stop."

"Where?"

"Somewhere. It's not far."

Edgar and Alan exchange looks; there is something going on. "Sam, where are we going?" Edgar asks again.

Sam cannot contain it much longer. He turns around to face his friends. Judging by the idiotic looking grin on his face, the Frog brothers know that it cannot be good. "It is time for your guys' next lesson," Sam announces. "Today we are going to learn about clothes and-."

"No!" Edgar exclaims. He tries with all of his self control to resist punching Sam in the face, but he can feel himself slipping.

"So we are going to the mall."

That's it; he needs to be punched in the face.

Alan glances at the door handle, contemplating escape. It would be dangerous jumping out of a moving vehicle, but a few bruises would less painful than having to go to the mall. Michael notices this and quickly hits the childproof locks. "Sorry, bud, you're trapped."

"I hate both of you," Edgar says. "I am not going to the stupid mall."

"Yes you are. We're going there right now," Sam says.

"Well, I'm not going in it."

"I guess we will just have to drag you in then."

"You can't."

"I may not be able to, but Michael can. He's bigger than you."

Edgar scowls at Sam's brother. "We save you and the rest of your family from becoming permanent bloodsuckers and this is how you repay us? That is completely fucked up."

"I'm sorry," Michael says with a smile. "It was Sammy's idea."

"So? You didn't have to listen to him; we never do."

"I'm sorry guys, but this is important," Sam says. "Maybe you'll have fun. You did yesterday!"

"That was not fun," Edgar growls.

Alan nods in agreement. "We're not going."

"Gosh, you guys are so negative!" Sam says, shaking his head.

Edgar kept to his promise about being difficult. He sat in the car with his arms across his chest for nearly five minutes while Sam tried to reason with him. It was not until Sam made Michael go over to force him out did Edgar finally get out of the car. "This is a terrible idea," he grumbled as they walked toward the building.

The mall is a completely new world to the Frog brothers, one that they did not wish to exist in. It was a terrifying place, filled with strange looking creatures chatting loudly as they carried shopping bags, bright, blinding lights and strange smells. "Can we go home?" Alan asks.

"Nope! We're just getting started," Sam says. "We've got a lot of work to do."

"We don't have any money," Edgar says.

"What? You guys work all of the time, how can you not have any money?"

"We don't get paid for working there. All of that money goes towards bills and food and shit like that."

Sam and Michael look at each other. "Alright," Sam says. "I guess we can scope out clothes and play dress up today, and come back later to buy some!"

"No."

"Let's go!"

They walk through a section that sells mainly women's clothing. The Frog brothers shuddered at the sight of it; dresses, skirts, sparkles and oh god, the unmentionables. This is such a strange world. Edgar glares at two women holding out perfume bottles for women to sample. If they even try to spray him, Edgar will attack. It will be ok, though, even if they are girls; it will be in self defense. Alan pauses a moment and looks at woman standing behind the makeup counter. There is something off about her, and he cannot decide what. It has something to do with her face; her foundation does not quite match up with the rest of her skin colour, it stops blending in part of the way through leaving a rather noticeable paler and less greasy spot.

"What are you looking at?" Michael asks him.

Alan tilts his head slightly in thought. "There is something wrong with her face."

The woman behind the counter, who apparently heard them, turns and shoots them an icy glare. Michael gives her an apologetic smile. "Uh, kids, right?" he says quickly. "Let's go." He grabs onto the boy's sleeve and pulls him away, trying to catch up with the other two. Alan takes one last look at the lady with the oddly coloured face. "Didn't your parents teach you any manners?"

"No."

Michael sighs. "You can't say things like that, at least not out loud."

"But there was something wrong about her face."

"But you can't just say those things to people."

"I didn't. I said it to you, and only after you asked me what I was looking at. It's not my fault she has good hearing."

"Let's hope you don't talk to your date like that."

Alan scowls at the very thought of having a date. He is still not going to that dance.

Michael and Alan find the others in the men's clothing section. A rather heated debate was going on as Sam combed through the racks, picking out shirts and giving them to Edgar. The Frog would regard them for a moment before letting them fall onto the floor. "Are you trying to make me look stupid?" he asks as he drops a hideous patterned shirt.

"Hey, stop doing that! You're making a mess," Sam says. "And yes, I kind of am."

"You said you were going to help us."

"Oh, so you want my help now?"

"No!"

Sam hands him another shirt, which Edgar also disregards. "You know I am not going to try any of these on."

"What is with you and not wanting to try new things?"

"I just don't want to try stupid things."

Sam looks at the mess on the floor and sighs. This is going to turn out to be more work than fun. "You're also going to have to lose the headband, bud."

"Why?"

"Because it clashes with everything."

Edgar snorts. "Since when have you ever cared about clashing? Do you ever look in the mirror?"

"You can be such a jerk sometimes, you know," Sam says, wearing a scowl. "Now pick up those shirts."

"Yes, Mom."

Michael and Alan look at the mess Sam and Edgar have created. "What are you guys doing?" Michael asks.

"Shopping," Sam answers as he looks through more clothes. He is not looking for anything in particular, only the most revolting shirts he can find to piss off Edgar. "But someone, someone meaning Edgar, is acting like a toddler and throwing everything all over the place. I swear he has never been in public before."

"Yeah, I just had one of those experiences with Alan. You two are going to need a lot more lessons before that dance."

"I'm not going to that stupid dance!" Edgar exclaims. "And I am not trying on any of these clothes either."

"Again with the negativity," Sam says, shaking his head. "This cannot be healthy for you, Eddie."

"Well, look who it is!"

The four boys turn around. Before them stand the blond girl from the day before and her shy friend. Gina, the one who had spoken, smirks at them, holding a full shopping bag in her hand. "What are you doing here? Picking our your fancy wear?"

Edgar scowls. "No."

Eileen smiles shyly at Alan, feeling too nervous to even say hello. Alan fights the urge to slowly back away and make a run for it before Sam uses this as an opportunity to turn this into an even more awkward event.

"He's just throwing a tantrum," Sam says, motioning to the clothes that are left lying on the floor.

Gina looks at the scattered shirts. "Wow. I take it that you're a picky shopper?"

"I am not shopping," Edgar replies.

"Then what are you doing at the mall?"

"He tricked us into going." He points at Sam, who grins, clearly feeling quite proud of himself.

She rolls her eyes. "Well, you guys better get some shopping done because I am not going out with you dressed like some Rambo wannabe." She turns and begins to walk away. "Let's go, Eileen. These boys have a lot of work to do."

Eileen glances at her friend. "Um, bye, Alan," she says quickly before heading off after her friend.

"Who was that?" Michael asks.

"That was their dates," Sam says, still grinning.

"That blond girl seems a little on the angry side."

"Yeah. That's why she is perfect for Edgar!"

"She is not my date," Edgar says, crossing his arms against his chest. "And I told you a hundred times already; I am not going to that dance."

"You should have asked her what her name is."

"I don't need to know."

"Yeah, you do."

"I don't if I'm not going with her."

"But you are, so you do need to know."

Alan sighs has his brother continues to argue with Sam. This week needs to be over with, it's giving him a headache. "Can we go now?"

"Now? No we cannot," Sam says. "We're not even close to finishing here."

"But what about the one woman that might be a vampire?" Edgar asks. "Don't you think that is a little more important than stupid clothes shopping?"

"What are you talking about?" Sam pauses, now remembering his lie. "Oh, that. Uh, Edgar, there really isn't any half vampire dating my grandpa. I just said that because I knew it was the only way I could get you two to come with."

Edgar blinks. "I am going to kill you, Sammy."

* * *

**Pish, those Frog brothers are so negative! How can you not enjoy clothes shopping? It's so much fun! Well, this did not turn out as well as I would have liked it too. It seems that my writing has been lacking in certain areas lately. At least I finally got around to updating! Thank you to all of you that read and-slash-or review! You are all such lovely people!**


	4. Chapter Four

Just Dance

Chapter Four

After the mall disaster, Sam was sure that he would no longer have any control over Edgar and Alan over the dance situation. Much to his surprise, Sam found he was wrong. There was nothing unusual about that considering he is often wrong when it comes to dealing with the Frog brothers, but for once he was happy. Later on in the week, he had once again managed to convince his friends to go to the mall, this time with money and a promise of no throwing temper tantrums. It took a lot of work and a lot of empty lies, but Sam had pulled it off and was pleased with the results. They had managed to find two decent, plain white dress shirts; Edgar and Alan had both adamantly disagreed to any sort of colour or pattern or anything remotely resembling style.

"I don't see the point of these," Edgar had said, scowling as they walked out of the mall.

"They're shirts. You're supposed to wear that; that is what shirts are for."

"No shit. I don't see why anyone would want to wear them. They're too impractical."

But despite Edgar's best efforts of trying to argue his way out of going to the dance, Sam managed to keep him in place for the rest of the week. It is now the night of the dance; a week of torture is about to come to an end. Sam had invited Edgar and Alan over to his house so that he can help them get ready before the dance. The Frog brothers were reluctant, but eventually agreed. They gather in the living room with Star, Michael and Laddie, who watch the boys with amusement.

"I'm not going to this stupid dance," Edgar announces. Again.

"Yeah, yeah, we know. You've been saying that all week," Sam says as he buttons up his shirt. "Face it, Edgar, you're going. And you're going to have fun."

"No, I'm not." Edgar fumbles with a tie that Sam lent him. It was a solid colour, black, which came as a surprise to Edgar considering a majority of his friend's wardrobe consisted of strange and tacky patterns. Edgar Frog can do many things. He can kill vampire, carve wooden stakes and run a comic book store but he cannot tie a tie. "I'm not wearing this stupid thing either," he says, throwing the piece of material to the ground.

Sam glances over at him and grins. "You sure do have anger issues when it comes to clothes, buddy."

"Only when people like you make it so complicated."

"It's a tie, Edgar."

"Ties are-."

"Impractical, I know."

Star giggles. "Here," she says, rising from her seat. She walks over to the tie and picks it up from the ground. "I'll tie it for you."

Edgar's face begins to turn a brilliant shade of red. "Uh, no. That's fine. I'll just-." He stops his stuttering as Star wraps the tie around his neck and measures the length. Star looks up him and flashes a smile. Edgar feels his face becoming hotter, reaching all of the way to the tip of his ears. He is never going to survive this night, and neither is Sam.

"Do you know what you guys need," Sam says as he watches Star fix Edgar's tie. "Hair gel."

"No," Alan says. His voice is muffled as he lies face down on the couch with a pillow set over his head.

Sam walks over to the couch and sits on Alan's legs. "Come on, Alan. Just a little?"

"No."

"What if I said please?"

"No."

"What if I said pretty please?"

"No."

"What if I said-."

Alan tossed the pillow to the floor and struggled to move his friend off of his legs. "No, and stop before you make me feel worse."

"Why? What's wrong?"

"I just don't feel well."

"Aww!" Sam says, leaning more on Alan. "Is little Alan sick?"

Alan cringes at the annoying baby voice his friend is using. "Yes."

"He's faking it," Edgar says, joining the conversation. His tie lies perfectly on his chest, thanks to Star, and his face has returned to his normal colour. He is now feeling well enough to help focus some of the torment on his brother.

"Shut up, Edgar."

"Here, sit up." Sam moves so that Alan can free his legs. "Let me look at you so I can tell if you're lying." Alan moves to a sitting position and faces Sam. Sam studies his face, scrunching his eyebrows slightly in thought. "I'm going to test you, alright?" Alan nods. "Green apples." Alan looks at his friend, feeling confused at the random statement, but despite his best efforts to hold back, a small smile begins to form on his lips.

"There!" Sam exclaims. "You're lying!"

The smile quickly turns into a frown. "No I'm not."

"Yes you are. If you smile when someone says green apples you're lying."

"That is ridiculous," Alan says, turning away from his friend. He rests his head on the arm rest of the sofa, wishing he was at home in bed.

"It's true! It works every time."

"Not this time."

"He really doesn't look too good," Michael says. "If he throws up, you have to clean it, Sammy."

"Be quiet, Mike. He can survive a couple of hours, and after that he can puke his brains out all he wants."

"Maybe he's just nervous," Star says.

Alan scowls. "I'm not nervous."

"I bet you will feel better with hair gel in," Sam says."

"No."

"You guys are such fun killers," Sam whines. "All I'm asking is for you guys to dress up a little bit and maybe use some hair products. Is that so much to ask?"

"Yes," the Frog brothers reply in unison.

* * *

With the help of some good coercion skills and a few minor threats, Sam was able to get Edgar and Alan into Michael's car. During the last week, they, along with the girls came to the conclusion to meet up at the dance. They will be outside at half past seven, Gina had told them; any later and there will be bodily harm. The boys arrive at 7:28 with two minutes to spare and their dates were already standing outside the school doors, waiting. Sam turned around and grinned when he saw the Frog brother's pale, mortified faces. "Are you guys ready for some fun?"

"I'm not going in there," Edgar says defiantly.

"We're already here, Eddie. You need to stop being delusional."

"No."

Sam shakes his head as he opens the car door. "Let's go!" He looks back to see that neither of his friends has made any attempt to move. "Come on, guys; they're waiting."

"I'm not going," Edgar says, crossing his arms across his chest to help prove his point. He looks over at his brother. Alan sits quietly, his posture slightly slumped over and eyes half closed. Edgar jabs him with a finger to make sure he is still alive.

"You have to." Sam turns towards the girls and waves. "They're waiting for us," Sam says as he opens Alan's door. Alan glances at his friend and, very reluctantly, unbuckles himself and steps out of the car. "Come on, Edgar," Sam says. He is about to start begging when he remembers that he is the one that is supposed to be in charge of this situation. Not only does he have the power, but he also has backup. "Michael, help me get Edgar out."

Michael looks at the miniature vampire hunter from the review mirror. Edgar scowls at him, trying his best to look threatening. Michael, who has always found the Frog brother's tough guys act more humorous than anything, grins as he reaches for the car handle. The boy's eyes follow him closes as he draws closer. Edgar clenches his jaw tightly, preparing himself for battle. Just as Michael opens the door, Sam says, "Make sure you get his head band too. We can't have him looking that ridiculous." Edgar snaps his head in Sam direction, ready to shoot him a snarky remark about his fashion statements, but cut off when he feel a strong grip on his arm and his seatbelt goes loose. He is quick to retaliate; with his awesome vampire hunting reactions, Edgar latches onto Michael's arm and bites into the flesh. Michael lets out a yelp, but does not loosen his grip on the boy. With a forceful tug, he is able to pull Edgar out of the car and sets the angry Frog on his feet.

"Wait!" Sam exclaims are he rushes over. He quickly snatches Edgar's headband and throws it in the car before Michael let him go.

"What the hell did you do that for?" Edgar growled.

"I'm not going to let you go in there looking like an idiot."

"You should be worried about your health because I'm going to-."

Sam zones out on Edgar's rambling as he messes with his hair in the side mirror of the car. "That's nice, Eddie," he says, giving his hair one final tweak. "We need to get going now; we're wasting Michael's and the girls' time. Thanks for the help, Michael!"

"No problem." As Michael passes, he reaches out a hand and messes up his brother's freshly perfected hair. Sam scowls as he drives away.

"Alright," he says, turning to Edgar and Alan. "Let's go do this!"

The image of terror is different for every set of eyes. Some people may run screaming at the sight of a spider. Others may shiver at the thought of a circus clown. Going into a cave to assassinate a family of blood thirsty vampires that could potentially rip your throat open may be something most people would consider a horrifying experience. The Frog brothers are not afraid spiders or creepy clowns, and especially not vampires. They do, however, are left shaking in their combat boots when it comes to high school dances. It is unfamiliar territory; the darkened gym, the bright, flashy dance lights, the cheap crepe paper and balloon decorations. It is a whole new, terrifying world, one in which they have no desire to be a part of. They look at their classmates, who look more like aliens now with their poofy styled hair and blindingly bright dress clothes. "Why the fuck did you bring us here," Edgar asks Sam as he stares in horror at the scene before him.

"Because it brings me joy to watch you in awkward situations."

Gina glances over at Edgar. "Have you seriously never been to a dance before?"

"Of course not."

"I have a feeling that this is going to be a fun night." A sinister grin begins to crawl across her face. "Come on, date," she says, grabbing a hold of Edgar's wrist. "You're going to get me some punch."

"I'm not getting you anything." He pulls back, trying to free from himself. He is rather surprised by the strong grip the girl has on him.

"Yes you are." Gina yanks again and begins to drag him across the floor towards the refreshments table.

Sam laughs as he watches Edgar stumble after his date. "This is amazing. I wish I had a camera to document this."

His date, Cristey, looks at him and smiles. "Do you want to go dance?"

Sam does not even have to be asked twice. He grabs her hand and they head for the dance floor. This is shaping up to quite possibly be the best night of his life.

It takes Alan a moment to realize he is now alone with his date…Whatever her name is. He is starting to panic now; he has never been left alone with a girl before. Alan looks over at the brunette girl. She had taken her time getting ready for the event by carefully applying a thin, glossy layer of pink lipstick and dusting her eyelids with glitter. Her once chunky hair had been smoothed down and her bangs feathered. Alan stares in confused wonder at her dress; it is lacey and pink, and he cannot figure out why the sleeves are so large. She looks at him and offers a weak smile. Alan feels his stomach churning again; the heavy smell of perfume mixed with sweat radiating throughout the room is making him feel nauseous. He tries to think of something to say, anything to make this a little less awkward, but damn, he cannot get past those ridiculously poofy sleeves.

And then it hits him. The dress; he had been told to say something about her dress. Alan is now starting to feel thankful for Sam and his stupid lessons. "Um," Alan awkwardly begins. "I-I like your dress." His words come out in a quick jumble, but Eileen is able to piece it together. Her eyes begin to sparkle at the compliment, and Alan fears that she is going to burst into tears.

"Thank you! It's new; my mom let me pick it out. Pink is my favorite colour."

Alan nods dumbly, not sure of what to say next. Eileen looks out at the dance and he begins to worry that she will try to drag him out there.

"I really don't like dancing," she says. Her eyes shift to Alan. "I hope you don't mind."

Alan lets out a small sigh of relief. No, he does not mind at all. "It's fine."

"Do you want to go sit or something?"

"Sure."

* * *

"You know," Gina says before taking a sip of punch. "You are a terrible date."

"That is because I don't want to be here."

Gina shakes her head. "Here, drink some punch."

"I don't want any."

"Drink it."

"You can't tell me what to do."

"Drink it or I'll-."

"Or you'll what?

"I will step on your foot," Gina threatens.

Edgar looks down at her feet. She is wearing a pair of silver high heeled shoes that looks quite painful. "So? I'm not afraid of you or your fucking sparkly shoes."

Gina sighs as she lifts a foot. She drives it down, jamming the heel into the toes of Edgar's right shoe. He jumps a little, swearing at the pain. "What the hell is wrong with you?"

"Drink the punch or I'll do it again."

Edgar looks at the glass bowl. He has to give in for the sake of not becoming crippled. "Fucking psycho," he mumbles as he pours some of the red liquid into a plastic cup.

Gina smirks in triumph. "You have to drink it."

He peer down at the beverage; it reminds him of vampire blood. He frowns. "I can't drink this."

"Why?"

"It could be contaminated."

"Alcohol? You mean like spiked?"

"No," Edgar says, scowling. Civilians are can be so dense sometimes. "Vampire blood."

Gina blinks as she takes in the statement. "You think that his punch is spiked with vampire blood?"

"Yes."

"Wow." She shakes her head. "There is something wrong with you."

"Me? You're the one drinking it."

"And what would you do if this was vampire blood and I turned into a vampire."

"I would have to stake you."

"You really are a terrible date."

"I would be doing you a favor."

Gina looks into her cup, suddenly finding the punch a lot less appealing. "Let's go dance," she says, putting the cup down on the table.

"No."

"Come on." She grabs a hold of Edgar and begins to drag him away.

"I got you punch, isn't that enough?"

"Nope."

Edgar looks over and sees Alan sitting with that other girl. He waves to him, signaling for help. Alan smiles and waves back, not bothering to save his brother. "I'm sorry about Gina," Eileen says as she watches her friend drag Edgar to the dance floor. "She can be a little bossy sometimes."

"I'm alright with it." Alan watches as the pushy blond tries to force Edgar to dance. "I think he's enjoying himself."

Eileen squints her eyes to try to get a better look at the pair. "Really?"

Alan glances over at her and smiles. "Oh yeah, he's having the time of his life."

Edgar's luck turns even more sour as Sam comes over to join in on the torture. He bounces around the Frog, grabbing a hold of his arms and moving them about. Gina and Cristey stand close by, giggling. Edgar looks Alan's way again. He looks so desperate and out of place; it makes Alan feel a little better. He waves at his brother again, this time with Eileen joining him.

The night went on, quicker for some. The last two hours were especially grueling for Edgar as spent the rest of the time not only being tortured by his so called best friend, but the psycho blond girl with power issues. As they continued to torment him, Edgar came up with different plots to get his revenge.

Alan got off more easily. He was not forced to dance, not even by Sam who was having far too much fun with Edgar, but did get up once with Eileen to get punch. They spent most of the time talking, and Alan was quite surprised that it was not as awkward as he believed it would be. He would never, ever do it again, but it wasn't all that bad. As time went on, he began to feel worse, and though he tried to hide if from his date, Eileen picked up on it.

"Are you alright?" she asked.

"Yeah, fine."

It has come to the last song; a slow dance. Alan can see his brother on the floor near Sam, not even bothering to hide any of his displeasure. Gina does not mind, though. She moves Edgar's arms, forcing him to stand closer to her. Eileen glances over at Alan. "Well, this was fun," she says. She really does mean it. Eileen was not up to going to the dance; it was her mother and friend that pushed her into it.

"Yeah." Alan begins to feel guilty as he watches his brother suffering. He can spare a few minutes of agony for Eileen, at least she didn't make him do stupid things like Edgar's date. "Uh, do you want to dance? Since it's the last song and all?"

Eileen's eyes light up again. "Sure!"

She practically skips over to the floor as Alan follows her. They awkwardly set their arms around each other and Alan tries to think back to the dancing lesson. All he can think about is dancing with Michael. Eileen looks over at her friend and smiles; this is the best night of her life. Gina flashes her a thumbs up before going back to giving Edgar orders.

By the end of the song, Alan feels like he is ready to pass out. He tries to steady himself, trying to convince himself that he is alright, as the song faded out. "Thank you," Eileen says quietly. She is still so excited. All of her new found energy makes her feel bold; she rises on her toes a little and lightly kisses Alan on the lips. Alan stares at her dumbly, unsure of what just happened. All he knows is that he needs to not get sick right now.

* * *

"Wasn't that fun, guys?" Sam asks. The group of six stand outside, waiting for their rides to come pick them up. Sam keeps an arm around Cristey, his cheeks still slightly flushed from all of the dancing. "Isn't it nice being normal for once?"

"No," Edgar says. He has distanced himself from Gina, standing by Alan with his arms crossed. He wishes he had his headband. "I am never going to one of these things again."

Gina snorts. "It was defiantly an interesting experience." She looks over at a pale looking Alan. "What's up with him?"

"I don't think he feels well," Eileen says.

Gina frowns as she takes a step forward towards Alan. "What's wrong with you?" she asks, giving him a poke on the middle of his forehead. Alan falters a little as his world spins around him. Before he can stop himself, Alan lurches forward and throws up on Gina's shoes. Cristey and Eileen squeal as they jump back, trying to vomit. Gina stares soundlessly at her feet, her anger quickly rising, only becoming worse as Edgar begins to laugh.

"Well would you look at that," Sam says, sidestepping around Gina. "We have to go; my brother is here. I guess we'll see you ladies later!" He jumps back and quickly kisses Cristey on the cheek before making a run for it, dragging Alan with him.

"I hope you feel better!" Eileen yells as the three boys leave.

"That was awesome," Edgar says as the draw closer to the car. In a very un-Edgar moment, he slings an arm around his brother shoulders. "I love you, man. I seriously love you for that. It made this whole week worth it. I won't have to beat up Sam now."

"See, I told you it would be fun!" Sam says, grinning. He just had a successful date with a hot girl and got to torture his friends; not only did he get to torture them, but he is also not going to suffer any consequences. This is the best night of his life.

* * *

**Sorry if this seems rushed. It is half past two in the morning, which is super late for me. But I wanted to finish this because I haven't updated in over a month! So, now it's over and I can sleep. Thank you to all of those who read and reviewed!**


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